Fat Bastard's Gas Heats 15,000 Homes

DIRTY DOG DAILY ©

Fat Bastard’s Gas Heats 15,000 Homes
By Austin Girl

Chevron Corporation has discovered the source for the declining
ozone layer, debunking popular myth that manufacturers and
automobiles have played a vital role in global warming.

“Buddy Fat Bastard’s ass was found to contain high levels of
methane and sulphur gases,” said Chevron’s Chairman and CEO,
David O’Reilly at a news conference, which was held in a secret location.

“Our team of research scientists was flying over Texas when their
‘Who’s Messin’ with the Ozone Layer’ detection device went nuts,”
explained Chevron spokesperson, L. Nicole Ross. Using a high-pencil-
strength-steel gas pipeline, Chevron will downstream Fat Bastard’s gas,
heating 15,000 homes across the United States. “Fat Bastard has saved
Antarctica. Hell, this thing about Fat Bastard’s ass is hugeamongous,”
said President Bush taking a quick break from eating birthday cake
with Pope Benedict XVI.

Chevron has pledged two billion dollars to further develop a top-secret
invention called the ‘Fat Bastard’s Anal High-Pressure High-Volume
Linear Osmosis Conversion Valve.’ O’Reilly said Chevron is funding
this as a humanitarian effort to save the planet. He has been assured
that Rice University will use the funds to explore additional uses of flatulence.

Rice University scientists are in discussions with Texas A&M to expand
the use of this new scientific discovery for all other gaseous animals
including bovines. L. Nicole Ross said Rice University will hold the
patent on the anal valve.

Buddy Fat Bastard’s agent could not be reached for comment.

Chevron Corporation is one of the world’s leading integrated energy
companies, with subsidiaries that conduct business across the globe
and now in Fat Bastard’s gas.

If ya laughed and think Fat Bastard is friggin' funny...please tell everyone!


The Chevron logo is a registered trademark and bad Fat Bastard has used it for humorous intentions only.